Mollyisms and whatever else is bouncing around the room...

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Obama is Awesome


I love the Obamas.
I am watching the news on CNN and the president and first lady were being filmed while speaking to a second grade class about what is is like to live in the White House.

“Well, it is a very old house, but it is one of the most important houses in the country” Mrs. Obama said, nodding her head up and down and smiling at the children. “So we feel a very great responsibility.”
“Not to break anything,” my president said, grinning.
"Yes, not to break anything," she agreeed.
I LOVE these people.

He was also just talking about getting a dog-- he said his family will probably wait until it is closer to spring.

"I think we decided the girls will probably be more inclined to walk the dog when it is warmer out," he said.
I am charmed.

Monday, February 2, 2009

Bonghits aren't bad.

In fact, some say they are good.



Michael Phelps looks like he's no virgin to the sticky-icky and it seems like he's been pretty successful, but lately everybody is making a big deal about this pic. He's released a respectable statement that ought to pacify some critics.

"I engaged in behavior which was regrettable and demonstrated bad judgment. I'm 23 years old and despite the successes I've had in the pool, I acted in a youthful and inappropriate way, not in a manner people have come to expect from me. For this, I am sorry. I promise my fans and the public it will not happen again."

Some, of his critics have hushed, but not all. Little Elisabeth Hasselbeck had some smack to talk this morning, throwing out the role model card on The View.

In my humble opinion, this should pass, but I feel bad for the guy because I'm sure some people just won't let it drop. In the grand scheme of it all, its none of their business but because he is an athlete, things get dicey. As a long-time user of pot, in addition to other controlled substances, I will admit my bias in that direction, but I just don't see the problem with him smoking pot.

When was the last time pot helped anybody run faster? Would we have this problem if we saw him take a drag of a cigarette? If it's the legality thing that bothers some critics, 13 states have now passed law to legally 'tolerate' marijuana. I'm n0t sure if South Carolina (where the photo was taken, I believe) is one of them, but does it really matter? Some municipalities STILL have laws on the books about dancing. People do a lot of crazy shit that is illegal. People do a lot of crazy shit that is legal. The CDC reported that in 2006, 13470 people died in alcohol-related car accidents. Alcohol seems to be causing a lot of tangible losses, but clearly marijana is a problem in society. Is this what I'm supposed to believe.

How 'bout prescription drugs? Is it because big-name liquor, beer and pharmaceutical companies can lobby politicians with bigger and better perks than pot farmers, that much of the population is hooked on tranquilizers? Or anti-depressants? Or steroids? Or the sauce? And this is okay?


If we live in a society where people can LEGALLY take 'happy pills' (antidepressants?) I don't understand why marijuana has been the source of so much controversy. Marijuana is often my antidepressant, but I make no claims toward my own moral superiority. I'm flawed. So are the rest of you.


Some people argue this move was irresponsible because Phelps is a 'role model'. While I'm sure it is very flattering to be thought of as a role model (I don't think anyone has or will ever put that label on me) it must really suck to have people attack you for not living up to their standards of 'role model' behavior. The dude just wants to swim! He's good at it! Really good at it. He won a lot of medals because of his talent and drive to swim hard and fast. I don't think when he dives in, he's thinking about his responsibilty to the youth. That is such a 'mom' thing to expect.

The dude wants to swim, and people create role models because they are uncomfortable being themselves. These followers create a leader who didn't even run for the office. They expect their made-up role models to live up to the expectations the follwers have for themselves, forgetting that these are probably the expectations have made said follower into the person they don't want to be in the first place.

It's a vicious circle.

I'm over it.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Trippin'

Its February now. Time to pick up the pace with my plans. I should be getting a call to lock in my position in Denali and I really need to start planning this road trip.

For the first leg, Delaware to Oregon, I'm looking at:



Total Estimated Time: 44 hours 29 minutes

Total Estimated Distance: 2914.15 miles

Total Estimated Fuel Cost: $187.09



And this is before I factor in side trips/pit stops.

Haulin' it, we can make it in 4 days, averaging 11 hours a day. We will be traveling through/in close proximity to Baltimore, Maryland/DC; Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania; Cleveland, Toledo, Ohio; Chicago, Illinois; South Bend, Indiana; Cedar Rapids, Iowa; Lincoln, Nebraska; Cheyenne, Wyoming; Salt Lake City, Utah; Boise, Idaho; PORTLAND, OREGON!!!

This is the first direct route Mapquest pulled up for me. I would love to go to a million different places, but I don't know if time will allow for those shenanigans. Probably not.

Depending on how we are doing, we might want to make it 5 days. We just have to figure out where to sleep. I'm not against sleeping in the car, but this is going to be a long 5 days and we will have to find some showers somewhere. We could treat ourselves to a hotel somewhere, but that will be a chunk of change I'd rather spend on something cooler.

In Portland, I have some friends who recently relocated and rave about it. I've been told it is a really cool place and somewhere I would fit well. Sounds cool. I was thinking of just completely going there after the summer in Alaska. I still might, but this time it will just be a stop to see my navigator's cousin and my friends, then we will be picking up with my friend from Fairbanks. He tells me he will be on his way back from a winter in Baja around the time I will be heading back to AK, so if at all possible, we will be doing a caravan for the second leg of the trip.

Portland to Denali National Park/Refuge


Total Estimated Time: 47 hours 6 minutes

Total Estimated Distance: 2610.83 miles

Total Estimated Fuel Cost: $181.19*

* In Canada, gas is AT LEAST twice the cost. Shit!

This is another 4 to 5 day haul, including crossing national borders, Twice! I will be heading toward Seattle, Washington; the crossing the border into Vancouver, British Columbia; then heading north through B.C., hitting up the Alaska Highway and heading through the Yukon Territory. From there, we cross back into the US in Alaska. Then there's only another 500 or so miles (abt 8 hours) to get to Denali.

Once again, I think the routes will be modified, but a sample itinerary may be:

Leg 1:

Leave (April 26) to Ohio/Indiana (600 miles?)

Day 2: Who knows... More to come.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Planning

I'm waiting for a call from my future employers in Alaska. It makes me a little nervous not to have things locked in, but I have to remind myself, it is still January.

The restaurant I'm returning to opens on May 9. That's roughly 3 1/2 months away.
I have some business to attend to.
So far:
*I've got my IPod.

This sucker is 120 gb! I don't even know that many songs, but since I'm really thinking of driving again, I will need to pack as many songs on there as possible. So far, I've filled up a little more than 27 gb. I have put 6152 songs on and I am out of CDs. I borrowed my friend's hard drive full of music and stuck that on too. That's where the bulk of the music came from, really. It was 2o gbs. I don't know how I'll fill almost 100 gb of space still left on the ipod. I don't care. It's there.

*I got my new computer.
It cost me roughly $1,000, but that's OK because it is a fine machine. Every time I look at the new computer-- a Sony Vaio I bought with a brand-new Circuit City credit card... Ha!-- it makes me happy. I'm sure the bills will come eventually, but I'll dispute the service pack since they are closed now. I'm also going to claim my new laptop on my taxes. After all, I am a freelance journalist, even if I lack the motivation to make a sizeable income from it.
I named her Sasha Fierce (yes, like Beyonce's new album, except fiercer!)


*I've already pulled my clips out of the thick STACKS of newspapers I wrote for, when I wrote for them.



I still need to:

*Put more of my favorite clips into PDF format.

*Contact the Fairbanks Daily News Miner re: freelancing in Denali.

*Go through inspection with my car? This way, in case I just keep roaming for a while after my summer in Alaska, I won't have to get my car tagged for another two years. This is reasonable, right?

*Get a new set of tires? I think mine are fine, but I'm not sure I shouldn't just go ahead and get another set. Alaska is pretty far away.

*Get rid of my furniture, but this is further down the line. I still need a bed to sleep in until April, right?*Pull my pictures off my old, demolished computer before I find a place to make that thing get out of my life.

I'm sure there is more, but I'm tired and this is enough for me, for now.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Hope

For the first time in 8 years, I believe in our government.
I'm thrilled to see the ideals of my childhood start to be fulfilled. I, like the rest of America, had almost given up on the ideas of living in a melting pot, of racial equality, of responsive government, of intelligent leaders.... of America.
This exerpt of a final interview with George W. Bush in Rolling Stone sort of makes it evident why America has been ailing. Journalist Matt Taibbi conducted the interview.


Let's talk about August 6th, 2001. That's the day you got a memo warning about plans for possible attacks by Osama bin Laden and Al Qaeda. What were you doing that day?
I'll be honest with you. I was at the ranch, on vacation. I was watching the Hall of Fame game on TV. First NFL preseason game of the year, hate to miss it, you know?
I'm the same way. It doesn't matter what teams are playing, I watch it.Exactly. It's a long off-season, and you start to miss the game. So I'm watching it — I remember it was Miami and St. Louis. First time I ever saw Marc Bulger. He was just a backup to Warner then. I think he threw a touchdown in the fourth quarter. I thought to myself, "This guy looks pretty solid in the pocket. He might have a future in this league."
That's good foresight right there.Anyway, it was right around then that they brought me my PDB [Presidential Daily Briefing], and it said something about bin Laden. I mean, we get these warnings about foreign terrorists all the time. How was I supposed to know he was going to attack in the United States?

Well, the memo was titled "Bin Laden Determined to Attack in U.S.
"It was?

Yes, sir.
Well, nobody told me that.
But they wrote it to you.But nobody told me that they wrote it to me.


Who's "they"?
I don't know. Whoever is in the room. Vice President Cheney. Don Rumsfeld. Rove. Sometimes there's some other guys. It kind of rotates.

Do you decide who "they" is?
No, they usually decide who they is. Or at least one of they does. Usually Cheney.
Interesting. What did they tell you they wrote to you about why America needed to invade Iraq?Sometime in the fall of 2001, pretty soon after 9/11, Rumsfeld and Cheney handed me a piece of paper. I asked them what was in it. Rumsfeld says, "Mr. President, we've just written you a memo explaining that we need to invade Iraq." And I said, "OK. Why?" And Dick says to me, "Because of 9/11, Mr. President."
[Silence]

Is that the whole story?
Yeah. Why?

All I can say is WOW. No wonder we are in such shambles! Our former president is a moron! He seems like the kind of guy who will scratch his balls and walk over to your plate of food, say 'Emm, your lunch looks good,' and pick up something right off your plate.

Never again!

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Remorse

Alright, I give.

Not even one week after my boyfriend and I broke things off, I'm actually missing him. After spending the past few days revisiting all the reasons he sucks, it's 9:15 and really cold outside and I miss him.

I'm not going to fool myself with delusions of undying love for this guy. I always knew I didn't really want to spend forever with him, but there were times when I started to contemplate the idea and it didn't seem so crazy. He would love me and protect me, and that's reassuring. The idea of having someone who will look out for you brings up the warm-and-fuzzy feelings that are, in turn, making my eyes tear up a little bit right now.

I will have to remind myself of all the reasons the ex-boyfriend is crazy later. Right now I think even though the relationship barely lasted 4 months, I can still mourn. It sucks to sleep alone.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Knocked Up

I feel like everyone in this world is preggers right now. I happily exclude myself from these statistics, but if you aren't (and don't want to get knocked up) I would stop reading now and make a conscious decision NOT to be my friend. It seems to be catching.

There is going to be a serious baby boom, beginning in May, I can feel it. My sister is due sometime during that month. I will be in Alaska already, so I consider it a good omen for little Gianna (who I will call GIGI). My first neice was born while I was in Alaska and I got to meet her when I came home the next month. It was a surprise visit and my little nugget of a neice was pretty cool. She still is. Gigi is going to be a great kid and I will be able to commisserate with her about what a giant pain in the ass big sisters can be (her mom is my big).

Other than that, not one, but three friends just came out of the closet about harboring a parasite (those with some tact and taste would say being pregnant). As a non-mother who has never been pregnant, I recognize it's perfectly natural to be pregnant. It is possibly the most natural thing ever, but if I have to support some little being off the nutrients I put into my body (and have to lay off the sauce) this thing is a parasite. It can stop being a parasite -- even during the pregancy-- once I have something human to associate with it, like a gender.

I am happy for my friends and family. Thrilled for most, in fact, but this is all tempered by ay n inward sigh of relief I breathe when I receive confirmation from my body that I am not pregnant.

I am 27 years old. I think I used to want to have babies by now, but now that I'm here, I have no desire. I broke up with the mercurial boyfriend on Monday and got my period on Tuesday. I was probably a little more thrilled than I usually am.

I would still love to have children one day. It's something I've always wanted to do, but I have now become comfortable with the idea of taking my 20s for myself, pursuing a career and developing interests (bolstered by my string of failed relationships and flings). So comfortable, in fact, that pregancy seems like it would be the worst thing in the world to happen to me.

It wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for the fact that I have yet to meet a man who I would want to father my children. I think that's clutch. Maybe not for some people, but I just don't think I'm strong enough genetically, mentally of physically to make up for a real piece of shit baby daddy. I mess things up enough for myself, I can't go create another person to mess things up for.

Basically, the concept of being responsible for the creation of another human being for the rest of my life is a little too much for me right now.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Singles

My boyfriend and I just broke up and it was awesome.
I met my EXboyfriend at a Keller Williams concert in September. He walked up to me and my friend, Lisa, who he already knew and asked us if was abrasive.
Well, being someone who has (wrongly) been accused of being abrasive herself, I took the bait and replied.
"Well, I just met you, but no," I said. "Of course you are not being abrasive, you were probably just being honest."
After he bought me my third tanqueray and tonic, I led him back to my house where I took advantage of him, and he the same of me.
Well, my one-night-stand held on for slightly more than 4 months, but it looks like I might just be free. I mean, I suppose I should be upset. I was for about 3 minutes and then I checked the lock on my door and removed the spare key from underneath our welcome mat.
I am free!

Saturday, January 10, 2009

The Candyman Can

When I was working at the newspaper, I was responsible for writing a section of the paper called 'Our Neighbors' which I filled the section with profiles of people within the community, with the operating premise that everyone has a story.

Often, we would profile people who did or do something extraordinary, but many times, this section became the place where my editor stuck pushy people who wanted to bully their way into the paper. As a result, I would be forced to meet with that person and figure out what was interesting about the jerk so readers would feel like there was a reason they were reading my story.

When I wasn't being bullied into providing free press for someone's bullshit hobby, the section was my favorite to write. Sometimes, I would write about people with 'dirty jobs,' like the septic guy who drove a truck that read 'We're #1 for your number 2.'

Other times, I would pick people for the section just because the art (photos) for the story would be colorful and timely, like in the spring and early summer when I profiled a blueberry farmer one week and later I wrote about the owner of a pick-your-own peach farm just as the trees were heavy and bowed with fresh peaches. I thought it gave me some fodder for introducing a little imagery into the profile.

Well, last year Easter came early and snuck right up on me. I didn't really have anyone lined up for 'Our Neighbors' as I was preparing for the issue of Easter week. I was actually pretty clueless about who would be my neighbor. I hadn't really gotten all that adjusted to the paper and wasn't really thinking in terms of great photos and introducing imagery verbally. I just wanted to figure out how I was going to fill 12 to 15 inches of space with info about someone. Anyone really. I had to write 8 to 10 articles that same length every week. There wasn't time to dilly-dally.

Taking a look at it numerically:
12 to 15 inches of newsprint
8 to 10 times weekly
3 sources/contacts per story
1 photo
30 words per inch

On a busy/productive week, I was talking to 30 sources.
Producing 150 inches of newshole, or 450 words,
Arranging and assigning 10 photos to one photographer.
Producing 10 newspaper articles that I would feel comfortable not only signing my name next to, but also my email address and work number, including extension.
And trying to tell a readable, interesting Feature story in every single one.

No wonder I quit to sling hash and make money again.

Well, with Easter sneaking up on me (there was always extra work to do leading up to a holiday) I asked my editor if she had any ideas for one of the two papers I wrote 'neighbors' for.
She jumped right in and said, "How 'bout a someone who makes their own candy? One of these candy shops on the boardwalk still has to make something themselves. Candy Corn? Fudge? It's for the Easter paper, so it will be timely."

"Good thinkin'," I said and walked to my desk, wondering how I was going to track these candy makers down in March when nothing gets up and running at the beach until at least the middle of April.

Well, they have phone numbers, I thought, figuring I would get started as soon as I left the office. I only got through on one number and I left a message because it was always safer to give a warm-up call and leave a message because some people still really freak out with journalists, despite all the fame-whores this country seems to be producing. I really had to step it up a few notches when I first got the job and almost had an anxiety attack after I realized how much time I would have to spend on the godforsaken, always-ringing phone.

Anyway, I left a message at a long-standing candy store whose owner had left contact information for prospective employees.

"Looking for summer work? Why not be a kid in a candy store and join the 'insert candy-store here' team for summer 2008? Call XXX-YYYY to apply"

So, I called XXX-YYYY and left a message to see if there was anyone who made the treats, in-house and promptly received a call back, even before I got to the next candy store to play investigator.

"Hi, is this the reporter trying to reach someone from Candyland?"

"Yes, this is Molly speaking. I was wondering, do you have a resident, um, candy-maker?"

"Well, no there isn't anyone, in-house, who makes candy. There actually isn't anyone in town who makes their own candy anymore, I just bought Candyland and nobody does it these days."

"What? No fudgemakers? Or Taffy-pullers? You mean not one of these shops makes their own candy? I mean, this is the beach, what about carmel corn" I said before realizing that even if there were still resident candy makers in town, they certainly weren't pulling taffy in 20 degree weather for the hoards of tourists outside.

After I realized I wasn't going to have anything to go with now that the Oompa-Loompas were taking the winter off, I realized I could still run with a story and instead of focusing on an actual candy maker, I would just write about the owner of the Candyland. He seemed to have a lot of stuff he was planning to do to expand the 70-year old Candyland he bought the previous summer.

"Well, I'm sorry to find no one in town makes their own candy. Wha? Ok, you get your fudge from New Jersey? Interesting," I said, without really caring. "Alright, well we can still work with this. You are open on some weekends, ok, I see. Well, how's Tuesday fit into your schedule?" I said and made arrangements to meet with the new owner of Candyland at the beginning of the following week.

When I met with the new owner on the following Tuesday, he was clearly excited to be getting some free press. As I made my way around the store, he pointed out he was voted Best Downstate Candy Store in a poll created by a statewide magazine. He made me a 'chocolate soda,' a concoction that adds even more fructose to sodas and gave me the phone numbers of some regular customers and business associates as further sources.

He showed me more than 40 varieties of fudge and chocolate candies. The gummi-bar, featuring a menagerie of gummi-animals, beyond the usual assortment of bears and worms. The store had a black-and-white checkered floor and some vintage-looking tables to sit down and have a pop at. After all, the store dated back to the days when teens would meet up for a pop at the end of a school day.

While we were chatting, the owner said he was a transplant, moving within the past 5 years after working in publishing. He said he had previously worked as a travel writer, which sparked my interest, and said he had even published a magazine in the area. I was interested until it became apparent that his magazine was geared more toward an alternative lifestyle. Basically, he was publishing a gay magazine.

While this might have raised alarm signals for many, the beach where Candyland is located is known for it's large population of homosexual and lesbian residents. Think Provincetown, Cape Cod, but less garrish and campy.

If I ever got my hands on one of the magazines, I think it was definitely something I wasn't very interested in, but not a red flag. I certainly didn't want to label myself a bigot and I only had so many inches of space to delve into the history of the shop, the new shop he was opening of the same name, the genesis of the candy that satisfies our cravings and rots our teeth.

I wrote the story and gave it a real willy wonka spin. I mean, really, a gummi bar? How could I not? When the story came out, the headline read "The Candyman Can' and I went on about my business for the next two weeks.

After eating mushrooms and having a particularly bad trip one Sunday, two weeks after the story came out, I awoke at 7:30 on Monday morning to the sound of my cell phone buzzing with a text message.

I read the text and almost swallowed my tongue when a family friend told me that a local radio personality said my name on air and was talking about one of my articles.

"Oh shit." was my immediate reaction. I went down to the only radio I had that worked, the one in my car, and I heard the host talking about the owner of Candyland. The radio host had bad blood with the man over business dealings in the past, but this did not change the issue at had: The owner of Candyland was a convicted pedophile from Missiouri and he bought the local candy store, his pedophilia charges from Missouti notwithstanding.

"Holy shit? What?" I thought, and then I could feel my insides tightening up.

Nevermind the host was an old muckraker and I was not up for holding a press conference at 8 a.m. on the morning talk radio circuit, I just wanted out of my life, like,immediately. All I wanted to do with the story was write a fun profile for Easter! Now, I felt like I wanted to burn it, except I was glad someone was talking about what was really up with this dude.

I started shaking a little when I thought about going to the newsroom. I hoped no one was listening and I believed I was the worst reporter in the world. Clearly, I believed, I was. How could I have been so naive. The publisher of a gay magazine owns a candy store in town? What do you do?

As it turns out, the Candyman was a kiddie-toucher who served time in Missouri and high-tailed it to the East Coast for a chance at a new life.

I wonder if it is known in the ranks of kiddie-touchers that they don't have to re-register as such when they move to Delaware (although I'm unsure of exactly how it really works).

I got hate mail. Real, live, no-return address, postmarked in New Jersey HATE MAIL.
On one hand, I felt I made it. On the other, I was miserable. How could I have been so negligent?
It wasn't until I followed up on one of the hate-emails I received that I could make some peace with it.

A woman emailed me, asking how I could have written such a kind story about such a villian. I wanted to shoot a response back to her telling her exactly where she could go and how she could get there, but then I saw she CC'ed the radio host, and virtually everyone else at that station.

No thank you, I've learned my lesson. I no longer eat mushrooms on Sundays. I realize what I put on paper lingers, even after my mood disappates.

I called her and asked her if she would have wondered who owned her local candy store if it weren't for my story? I asked her if it was really my job, as a reporter, to make sure this man could not be in contact with children, or maybe if it was her job, as a citizen, to mobilize and make changes in her community if she would like to see them.

That shut her up. Hopefully she's mobilizing right now, maybe to this tune:
Who can take a felony record?
Move a time or two?
Seperate the sorrow, and create a petting zoo?
The candyman can,
cause he mixes it with chocolate sodas, webkins, gummis and love,
and an adolescent for you too.

Friday, January 9, 2009

I love New York

It's been awhile since I've given the blog any love. What can I say? The holidays are great for filling up your time with food and family and booze until, if you are anything like me, you wake up sometime in January and decide it's time to clean up your life.
I don't know how successful I've been so far, but I've made some changes. Modifications, really.
I paid off my credit card at the end of December, just in time for me to open another one and charge more than $1200 for a computer. I had such great intentions with my $350 pseudo-budget. The good news is, my computer is awesome. I got a Sony Vaio and it was only 800, but then I had to get the people who know what they are doing to get it up and running. I also paid a lot of money so I could call a help number for the next 3 years or so-- and talk to someone whose first language is English. But did I mention my new computer rocks? And it's RED! It is Fierce! Rarely do I have such joy at my purchases.
So, out with the old debt and in with the new? I guess, but I also realized I haven't been paid anything for the cover stories I've been writing as a freelancer, so that's almost $400 bucks backed up. I hope to get out of this debt by the time I leave for Alaska. That would be great, but a stretch. Especially since I will also have to raise the funds to fly or drive up there. Now flying is actually seeming like the more cost-efficient option, but I'm still unsure.
As far as the Oregon Trail I like to imagine myself on, it's going to take some more bends before I make it out there for real. I got the idea of NYC back in my head and now I'm thinking I may just take my summer savings and come back to the East Coast.
New York City has always seemed to me like the biggest and greatest city we've got here in the US. I mean, if anything defines my idea of real and this is it. I've always been kind of intimidated and awed and scared and drawn to New Amsterdam.
I think taking up in NYC for a year or two following a new adventure in Alaska could be good. It could be very good.
I still want to make my way West, but if I don't do New York now, I'm afraid I never will.