Sausagefest 2009

So I worked my first job in San Diego last weekend.
Get this, I sold, of all things, SAUSAGES at the Chargers preseason game!

If you know anything about this land of wangs, are thinking the same thing I was when I heard which booth I would be working at.

"Sausage, here? In Man Diego?"

Really?
Yes really.
I hustled Italian Sausages, imported from Boston, from 2:30 in the afternoon 'til 11 at night.

"Hot Dogs, CHEESESTEAKS, chicken, beef tips, SAUSAGE!"

I bellowed from my station, directly in front of the serving windows and even into the pedestrian walkway to make a sale.

This way I could hustle some $10 sausage sandwiches before people even knew what hit 'em.

What can I say, it was fun.

One lady got pissed when she found out a sandwich was $10 and a 20 oz bottle of soda was $5.25. I was definitely happy I didn't have to pay those prices, but what do you expect at a football game??

Sourpuss looked up at me and scowled "$10 for a sandwich? Oh, that's outrageous."

I took one look back at her scowling sourpuss and couldn't help it, this woman was a shrew.

"Well 'maam, I wouldn't breathe too deep if I were you. You should see our prices for hot air."

My bike and my 2 step

So, about 3 weeks ago I landed in sunny San Diego with roughly $1100 in the bank and an air mattress awaiting in the home of an old friend.

It's go time.

That day, I got my pride and joy here in the land of eternal sunshine and air mattresses. Pepper is my fire-engine red, one-speed beach cruise with black tires and a black front basket.

And Pepper has a bitchin' bell.

Tonight, I rode on the trail that runs along the bay from Crown Point to Mission Beach. It attracts the masses, walkers and runners, bicyclists, skateboarders and roller bladers, all for good reason.

It is lovely.

The marine layer was starting to come in as I took off around 7 p.m.

I didn't know it would be smart to take my light off the bike, or even that it came off, till somebody already swiped it. So, I'm limited to day cruising. I'll buy another one on credit soon.

Hopefully I'll have a job by then, so maybe cash, but tonight, I had to get back from my first ride to Mission Beach before it got too dark. I hate driving cars at night and I don't expect a bike to be much more fun.

It was excellent, however, to cruise down the bike trail that the city of San Diego installed around the whale's vagina (You'll know what I'm talking about if you've seen Anchorman. Or you are German :-).

The trail is pretty safe, I believe, but the light thing will still be clutch in my adventures on a beach cruiser. And as long as we're on the safety kick, I also believe I am the only person in Pacific Beach who wears a bike helmet. I'll be honest, it's uncomfortable and I hate it (though it has gotten better since I started wearing my Phil's cap underneath). But, I must, so I do.

I think I would probably be pretty safe from other cars while I was on the trail, but there is still danger on this trail.

Remember all those walkers and bikers and roller bladers? Oh yeah, and dogs too. There's always something out there to be wary of. People can just be oblivious and sometimes that trail can get pretty packed. You can yell out, but who wants to yell at somebody?

That's when I use my left index finger to employ Pepper's greatest feature, Bella.

"ring ring" she goes.

"Don't just stand there, bust a move... ON YOUR LEFT" Pepper cruiser says as Bella chimes. Bella ringer has a silver body with a turquoise center and a flamingo perched in the middle.

I love her.

Falling into places

Big news today! I got hired in Alaska!

I talked to one of the guy who runs the kitchen today and got really psyched. It is just so different there. Magical. The place I worked is the only bar in Denali with live music regularly and independent ownership. I love it there. They have rules that make sense and they are all very strict, but not without reason.
They have a rule that employees can't have alcohol 8 hours prior to their shift. 10 or 12 if they are driving. I love that.
How wonderful. Alcohol is my biggest vice, though I have six other "close seconds."
I like working at this place (and the money is good enough), I don't even mind living in a shack all summer with no heat, electric, water, plumbing inside. Just a couple mattresses on a thin carpet and a sleeping bag.


What am I talking about? I can't wait to get there! I might switch shantys this summer, I scouted them out when I was there before. I might not. It doesn't matter when you are living in Neverland.

In other news, the plan to drive is out. It would be a wonderful stunt, yes, but in all, it was an expensive and time consuming endeavor. Too much to be classified as a stunt.

Dark Side of the Moon

What a weekend. Good, bad, ugly, sad.



I lost a friend. I used to babysit this guy. RIP Andrew Geyer. Tragic.


I dressed for prom, but didn't go. That was on Valentine's Day night. A bar was hosting an 80s prom party so I went to the Salvation Army, bought a dress and teased my hair. I also drank most of bottle of wine. I lost my nerve and woke up on Sunday to a beam of sunlight that found its way through the crack in my blinds and into my retina.


Really, I'm not too bummed about missing prom. A girl I used to work with is hosting an 80s prom party of her own this weekend. Round two, ding ding.


This girl who is hosting the prom party is also largely responsible for another episode of my weekend. I got FIRED on Thursday. Fucking Fired. I've never been fired, but I don't really care. Now I will have more time to write and will just have to cut costs so I can live within my means: unemployment.


In brighter news, I decided now that I have no job in addition to unemployment, but I am still being paid to do nothing, I will dedicate myself to writing with renewed vigor.


I attended my first freewrite with the Rehoboth Beach Writers Guild. If was awesome. They have 5 of them each week and now, they will be my workshops.

I think I have an idea for a book. They were really receptive to my Alaska stories at the freewrite. I want to write a novella of short stories based mostly on my own stories and experiences, mixed in with a little dramatic irony.

The book will be titled Dark Side of the Moon and the door to my shanty in Alaska will be on the cover.

Obama is Awesome

I love the Obamas.

I am watching the news on CNN and the president and first lady were being filmed while speaking to a second grade class about what is is like to live in the White House.

“Well, it is a very old house, but it is one of the most important houses in the country” Mrs. Obama said, nodding her head up and down and smiling at the children. “So we feel a very great responsibility.”
“Not to break anything,” my president said, grinning.

"Yes, not to break anything," she agreeed.

I LOVE these people.

He was also just talking about getting a dog-- he said his family will probably wait until it is closer to spring.

"I think we decided the girls will probably be more inclined to walk the dog when it is warmer out," he said.
I am charmed.

Trippin'

Its February now. Time to pick up the pace with my plans. I should be getting a call to lock in my position in Denali and I really need to start planning this road trip.

For the first leg, Delaware to Oregon, I'm looking at:

Total Estimated Time: 44 hours 29 minutes

Total Estimated Distance: 2914.15 miles

Total Estimated Fuel Cost: $187.09

And this is before I factor in side trips/pit stops.

Haulin' it, we can make it in 4 days, averaging 11 hours a day. We will be traveling through/in close proximity to Baltimore, Maryland/DC; Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania; Cleveland, Toledo, Ohio; Chicago, Illinois; South Bend, Indiana; Cedar Rapids, Iowa; Lincoln, Nebraska; Cheyenne, Wyoming; Salt Lake City, Utah; Boise, Idaho; PORTLAND, OREGON!!!

This is the first direct route Mapquest pulled up for me. I would love to go to a million different places, but I don't know if time will allow for those shenanigans. Probably not.

Depending on how we are doing, we might want to make it 5 days. We just have to figure out where to sleep. I'm not against sleeping in the car, but this is going to be a long 5 days and we will have to find some showers somewhere. We could treat ourselves to a hotel somewhere, but that will be a chunk of change I'd rather spend on something cooler.

In Portland, I have some friends who recently relocated and rave about it. I've been told it is a really cool place and somewhere I would fit well. Sounds cool. I was thinking of just completely going there after the summer in Alaska. I still might, but this time it will just be a stop to see my navigator's cousin and my friends, then we will be picking up with my friend from Fairbanks. He tells me he will be on his way back from a winter in Baja around the time I will be heading back to AK, so if at all possible, we will be doing a caravan for the second leg of the trip.

Portland to Denali National Park/Refuge

Total Estimated Time: 47 hours 6 minutes

Total Estimated Distance: 2610.83 miles

Total Estimated Fuel Cost: $181.19*

* In Canada, gas is AT LEAST twice the cost. Shit!

This is another 4 to 5 day haul, including crossing national borders, Twice! I will be heading toward Seattle, Washington; the crossing the border into Vancouver, British Columbia; then heading north through B.C., hitting up the Alaska Highway and heading through the Yukon Territory. From there, we cross back into the US in Alaska. Then there's only another 500 or so miles (abt 8 hours) to get to Denali.

Once again, I think the routes will be modified, but a sample itinerary may be:

Leg 1:

Leave (April 26) to Ohio/Indiana (600 miles?)

Day 2: Who knows... More to come.

Remorse

Alright, I give.

Not even one week after my boyfriend and I broke things off, I'm actually missing him. After spending the past few days revisiting all the reasons he sucks, it's 9:15 and really cold outside and I miss him.

I'm not going to fool myself with delusions of undying love for this guy. I always knew I didn't really want to spend forever with him, but there were times when I started to contemplate the idea and it didn't seem so crazy. He would love me and protect me, and that's reassuring. The idea of having someone who will look out for you brings up the warm-and-fuzzy feelings that are, in turn, making my eyes tear up a little bit right now.

I will have to remind myself of all the reasons the ex-boyfriend is crazy later. Right now I think even though the relationship barely lasted 4 months, I can still mourn. It sucks to sleep alone.

Knocked Up

I feel like everyone in this world is preggers right now. I happily exclude myself from these statistics, but if you aren't (and don't want to get knocked up) I would stop reading now and make a conscious decision NOT to be my friend. It seems to be catching.

There is going to be a serious baby boom, beginning in May, I can feel it. My sister is due sometime during that month. I will be in Alaska already, so I consider it a good omen for little Gianna (who I will call GIGI). My first neice was born while I was in Alaska and I got to meet her when I came home the next month. It was a surprise visit and my little nugget of a neice was pretty cool. She still is. Gigi is going to be a great kid and I will be able to commisserate with her about what a giant pain in the ass big sisters can be (her mom is my big).

Other than that, not one, but three friends just came out of the closet about harboring a parasite (those with some tact and taste would say being pregnant). As a non-mother who has never been pregnant, I recognize it's perfectly natural to be pregnant. It is possibly the most natural thing ever, but if I have to support some little being off the nutrients I put into my body (and have to lay off the sauce) this thing is a parasite. It can stop being a parasite -- even during the pregancy-- once I have something human to associate with it, like a gender.

I am happy for my friends and family. Thrilled for most, in fact, but this is all tempered by ay n inward sigh of relief I breathe when I receive confirmation from my body that I am not pregnant.

I am 27 years old. I think I used to want to have babies by now, but now that I'm here, I have no desire. I broke up with the mercurial boyfriend on Monday and got my period on Tuesday. I was probably a little more thrilled than I usually am.

I would still love to have children one day. It's something I've always wanted to do, but I have now become comfortable with the idea of taking my 20s for myself, pursuing a career and developing interests (bolstered by my string of failed relationships and flings). So comfortable, in fact, that pregancy seems like it would be the worst thing in the world to happen to me.

It wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for the fact that I have yet to meet a man who I would want to father my children. I think that's clutch. Maybe not for some people, but I just don't think I'm strong enough genetically, mentally of physically to make up for a real piece of shit baby daddy. I mess things up enough for myself, I can't go create another person to mess things up for.

Basically, the concept of being responsible for the creation of another human being for the rest of my life is a little too much for me right now.

Singles

My boyfriend and I just broke up and it was awesome.
I met my EXboyfriend at a Keller Williams concert in September. He walked up to me and my friend, Lisa, who he already knew and asked us if was abrasive.
Well, being someone who has (wrongly) been accused of being abrasive herself, I took the bait and replied.
"Well, I just met you, but no," I said. "Of course you are not being abrasive, you were probably just being honest."
After he bought me my third tanqueray and tonic, I led him back to my house where I took advantage of him, and he the same of me.
Well, my one-night-stand held on for slightly more than 4 months, but it looks like I might just be free. I mean, I suppose I should be upset. I was for about 3 minutes and then I checked the lock on my door and removed the spare key from underneath our welcome mat.
I am free!